Shifter's Redemption (Wolf Pack Special Ops Elite Book 4) Read online

  There were half a dozen of us who had the same job as me, but the truth was, I knew very little about my role at the base. I was on a need-to-know basis, and apparently, I didn’t really need to know anything. Technically, I wasn’t a soldier, but a secretary, and while I was privy to some information, I didn’t know as much as say the Relief Division or the other players on the compound.

  And I liked it that way. I sometimes felt like if I knew too much, I would never be able to unlearn it. It was easier to go home to my apartment in downtown Savannah after a long day, pour myself a glass of wine and forget that I was, in my own way, promoting war.

  I don’t know if that was a fair assessment either. I mean, I wasn’t naïve. I knew that I worked at an army base and that General Slater was in charge of highly trained shifter operatives who often participated in top-secret missions. But that was about all I was allowed to know, and honestly, I was okay with that. The reality was my imagination did enough running off even without knowing the entirety of what happened at those events. It was enough to keep me up at night, even after those glasses of wine I downed to help me sleep better. I read the newspaper articles and doom scrolled online just like anyone else in my generation. Terrible things were happening in the world, and I probably played some part in all of it.

  Things had become so overwhelming that I’d almost considered making an appointment to see the army doc about a sleeping pill prescription, but I hadn’t brought myself to do that yet. There had been a couple reasons for that. One, admitting that I was overcome with the anguish of the world was not something I was prepared to do yet. And two, there was no way I could keep something like that a secret from my boss. Even if medical records were supposed to be confidential, I would have to be a special kind of oblivious to think that my superior did not see my files. And the last thing I wanted was for Slater or anyone else to think I was weak, even if I wasn’t a solider. I didn’t need to be told that women weren’t regarded very highly in the military. I wasn’t giving anyone ammunition to use against me.

  I rose from my desk and stretched, my neck cracking slightly as I did. I couldn’t wait to let my long, dark hair loose of the too-tight bun at the back of my neck. I would have liked to have worn my hair down at work, but short of shearing off the straight, shoulder-length tresses, that was not an option.

  “We keep things professional here, Ms. Huff,” Slater often preached, even when I wasn’t doing anything wrong. “Hair up, clothes clean, nails proper.”

  He had a few annoying mantras like that one which I learned to tune out over time.

  Sometimes I wondered if my superior wasn’t a machine. He never looked out of place, not a wrinkled shirt or a five o’clock shadow. He was perfect from head to toe, and if he didn’t make me so nervous, I might have thought he was attractive with his salt and pepper hair and strong jawline. Everything about him was quintessential general material.

  “Heading out?”

  I turned toward the door, not realizing that Shawna had poked her head inside. She was one of the other half dozen women who carried the same responsibilities as me. While I was stationed with General Slater, she tended to work with General Blake, but our jobs were sometimes interchangeable. Unlike me, Shawna did travel with the generals, and I didn’t envy her jetsetter lifestyle, even if she claimed it was a lot of fun.

  She says fun with her lips, but the bags under her eyes are reminiscent of a new mother.

  I imagined that going away with the teams was precisely like that—babysitting a bunch of testosterone-fueled men.

  “Yes, I’m heading out. Do you need anything before I go?” I asked, hoping that the answer was no. I was bone tired that Friday, and with Slater gone, I had been hoping to get out a little early, if only to get a few extra minutes of much-needed sleep. I didn’t think Shawna would rat me out.

  “Some of us are headed out to the Raven,” Shawna explained. “Any interest in joining us?”

  I instantly shook my head, maintaining the polite smile on my face. I had hoped that these invitations had stopped. The answer was always the same after all.

  “Not tonight,” I replied, but the night had nothing to do with it. I didn’t like going to the watering hole that so many at the base liked to frequent. The place had a weird vibe to me, being attached to a tattoo parlor. Not that I was opposed to tattoos or anything, but it seemed to attract an odd crowd.

  Or maybe it was the fact that Jane still worked there that bothered me.

  Technically, Jane was my first cousin twice removed…or was it a second cousin once removed? I can’t remember. The point was, I was related to the blonde who had been a fixture at the Raven for as long as I could remember, and I really didn’t like to chance upon her when I could avoid it. It was bad enough having to see her at family reunions or whatnot.

  Jane was my polar opposite. She was too outspoken and free-spirited. Bartending was the perfect job for her, but she would never be able to work at the base like I did, sorting through files and keeping a stoic expression on her face as soldiers paraded through the office. She was too hotheaded and passionate.

  Is that a bit of envy I feel toward her?

  I dismissed the thought and any image of Jane from my head. I wished Shawna hadn’t put her there in the first place.

  “You sure?” Shawna pressed. “It’s Friday night. Some of the boys might be there.”

  She offered me a sly smile, knowing that I was between relationships, but I shook my head. I wasn’t in the market for a new boyfriend, least of all a soldier. I saw enough of those guys throughout the day as it was. No matter how appealing Shawna tried to make dating a soldier sound, I couldn’t imagine it.

  “Nah,” I assured her. “I’m good. Have fun though.”

  I reached for my purse and made my way toward the door, which she held open for me. I paused to lock up as Shawna made her way down the step toward the compound.

  I stood where I was for a moment, taking in the darkening sky. It wasn’t late, but the days were getting shorter now as the colder weather was settling in. And while most people didn’t care much for the chilly air, I didn’t mind it. The summers sometimes got too hot, and while I wasn’t a big fan of the cold, autumn was my favorite. The colors were brilliant, and I vowed to go for a drive that weekend to take in the change of season before the leaves were gone.

  “Night!” Shawna yelled out, waving, and I returned the gesture, wrapping my purse tighter around my body as I hurried down the steps, toward the far lot where my car was parked.

  It was clear to see it was a weekend. There was a relaxed feel to the atmosphere, some of the soldiers tossing around footballs in the yard. Some of them paused to leer at me suggestively, but as always, I didn’t maintain eye contact, my head held high as I strode to my waiting Mustang. No one made overt comments, but I could feel them watching me. It was easier not to get involved, tempting as it might be. I’d be blind not to notice how attractive some of the men were, and being one of the few females regularly on the base, I was met with my fair share of advances, but that didn’t mean I had to respond.

  A polite “no thank you” usually did the trick, and before long, the offers stopped coming. I didn’t want a reputation for myself, and as the old adage went, I didn’t want to mix business with pleasure. Getting involved with coworkers was never a good idea, even if we weren’t technically in the same league. It was just another reason why I didn’t go to the Raven. I knew that a lot of the teams hung out there, and mixing handsome soldiers with lowered inhibitions was never a good idea.

  I was nothing if not in control of my emotions.

  I pulled out of the compound, instantly feeling the ease of stress off my shoulders as I made my way through the gates. Out of the corner of my eye, I saw one of the Relief Division wolves ambling back toward his unit, his eyes almost flashing in the dark. I found my head turning to watch him as I drove off, a spark of interest lighting through me as I did.

  He looks pissed off, I thought, b
ut it had nothing to do with me. We all had our own crosses to bear, and I was sure that the Shadows kept the house psychologist fully booked.

  Or maybe not for the same reason that I don’t go. They don’t want any record of their weaknesses.

  I’d never thought about it before.

  My stomach grumbled slightly, and I debated stopping for Wendy’s on the way home, but I quickly dismissed the idea. I had just started ordering a meal-kit subscription as part of my new diet plan. I didn’t need to lose weight so much as watch my bad habits, and while it was proving to be more work than I had hoped, I knew I needed to discipline myself better. I tried to hit the gym with some semblance of frequency, but my schedule left me feeling like there weren’t enough hours in the day. The least I could do was go home and cook dinner for myself. I prided myself on my good choices again.

  My apartment building was only ten minutes from the base, and soon, I was in the underground, pulling out my fob to let me in the downstairs hallway. By the time I got up to my place, I was more tired than hungry.

  Opening the door, I exhaled, feeling a twinge of remorse as I looked about the unit.

  I had spent a lot of time and effort decorating and designing the apartment. African tribal masks hung on the mauve walls, burgundy drapes half-drawn against the patio windows. Everything about the place was a hundred percent mine, and sometimes I found that troublesome.

  I flopped onto the couch as my long-haired Persian rubbed herself against my leg, mewling slightly.

  “I’ll get you something to eat in a second, Bella,” I promised her, stifling a yawn. It had to be Friday. I was exhausted, the week catching up to me entirely.

  Without realizing it, my eyes began to close, even without me taking off my shoes, my purse still against my shoulder. It happened a lot at the end of the week, the lack of sleep and mindless answering of phones fell on me in a torrent, causing me to crash. In seconds, I had dozed off on the couch, Bella purring at my side.

  Instantly, a scene unfolded behind my eyes. An explosion, children scattered and screaming as the Shadows busted in to overtake the chaos. Among them was the angry soldier I’d seen on my way off that base that day.

  “MOVE!” one of them howled at a terrified little girl. “Get over there!”

  The child bawled, tears streaking her pale face until the Shadow grabbed her arm and yanked her back.

  “Stop yelling at them!” I cried out to him, but my voice was lost in the anarchy, another explosion erupting. The Shadows were unfazed, moving forward in a solid line to shift and become a team of intimidating souls. Each wolf was bigger and scarier than the next.

  “They’re just kids!” I tried to say, but again, my sentiment was lost, and suddenly, I felt a shot in my leg.

  “You shot me!” I screamed, but as my eyes flew open, I shook my shin, and Bella peered up at me innocently. A trail of blood running down my calf told me that she had bitten me.

  “You little bitch!” I swore, jumping up to scowl at her. She mewled and darted toward her food bowl, indicating that I had left her too long. Half-limping, I made my way toward the kitchen, shaking my head in disbelief.

  “All right,” I muttered, rubbing my eyes, but the weird dream stayed with me. I knew it had stemmed from the articles I’d been reading over the past few days. I hadn’t been able to stop seeing pieces about shifter communities that were being displaced. No one came right out and said it was the Special Ops, but I’d been doing this long enough to know the work of the Relief Division. I just knew better than to ask any questions. Not that anyone would have answered them if I had. More likely, I’d just be fired and replaced with someone who could keep their mouth shut. That was the biggest prerequisite for the job; the ability to shut up and do what you’re told.

  I wondered if that was the same truth about the Relief Division.

  More and more, it seemed like they were leaving their marks on the world, causing destruction without any rhyme or reason, but I knew that couldn’t be a fact either. Slater most certainly had a plan, even if someone like me couldn’t see it. I merely wished that it didn’t leave such a mess in its wake, whatever his end goal might be.

  It was times like those that I wished that I had made more of an effort to befriend the Shadows and find out what was going on. If I had, I highly doubted that they would disclose any top-secret operations to a mere secretary.

  Anyway, that would be disloyal, befriending a soldier to sate my own curiosity. That’s something spies did.

  “Here,” I muttered, shoveling a cup full of dry food into Bella’s bowl. She eyed me balefully as though she expected wet food, but after her little attack, I wasn’t about to reward her behavior. “Don’t look at me like that. That’ll teach you.”

  I filled her water bowl and turned to the fridge to pull out the ingredients for that night’s meal, but as I did, I realized that I wasn’t hungry anymore, nor was I tired. The dream had given me an uneasy feeling that I couldn’t shake, and I knew that I wouldn’t sleep again until I cleared my mind. I scowled at the cat, knowing that if she hadn’t woken me so rudely, I probably would have slept through the night. Now, I had no choice but to figure out a way to turn of my overworked brain.

  Sighing, I reached for my purse again and ignored Bella’s curious but accusing look.

  “I’ll be back in a bit,” I promised her, even though I wasn’t sure that was true. It might be a while before my head was back in order, but that’s what long drives were for, after all.

  Chapter Three

  Darric

  Like clockwork, I woke in a sweat, covered from head to toe in wetness like I had just gotten out of the shower. I had long since dried, the towel still loosely draped around my waist as I flipped over, my naked body exposed to the complete darkness of the compound.

  Another nightmare, filled with screams and explosions, horrified children and confusion. Nothing I hadn’t seen a million times before, both in my own head and in real life. There was no reason why this dream should affect me with any greater intensity than any of the others. Yet it did, and I found I was trembling.

  How much longer am I going to do this?

  Edgy and irritated, I rose from the bed, feeling slightly off balance. For a moment, I considered having another shower, but I feared that I would just fall back asleep again. The remnants of the beers I’d consumed at the Raven had left my system by now, and any hope of getting back to bed after that nightmare was out of the question. There was only one thing left to do.

  I had to go for a run.

  Sighing, I jumped up from the bed and scoured the tiny bedroom for a suitable outfit. I didn’t want to be seen, so black seemed like the best fit for the evening. I didn’t bother with the lights, enacting my night vision to dress myself. I wasn’t going to a fashion show, after all. Just a good old-fashioned energy-burning sprint. Of course, I didn’t want to see anyone. The plan was to head through the backroads and up through the wildlife refuge before turning back and hopefully tiring myself out. But just because that was the plan, didn’t mean that was what was going to happen.

  There had been many nights like this, ones where I left the base with the best intentions, wanting to free my mind and body of all the nightmarish thoughts that plagued me endlessly, but instead, I’d return at dawn, even more wired for sound.

  Then again, there had been nights where I’d done exactly what I hoped; exhausted myself until I was ready to curl back onto my lumpy, single mattress and wake again to fight another day.

  Outside, the base was still, although I heard wafts of music from various parts of the compound. The weekend was starting, and my fellow comrades were intending to make the most of it as if there weren’t any other cares in the world. I pushed them all out of my mind and headed out of my unit, happy to leave the confines of the box behind me.

  That’s what it was, my trailer, at least to me. A box, barely bigger than a coffin, for us to “live”. The irony was not lost on me.

  Sometimes
I wondered if Slater hadn’t purposely put us in those little trailers to drive us crazy. We were the only team who was given shelter outside of the barracks, each member of the Relief Division in possession of his own trailer. At first, I had thought that it showed our ranks, but the more I thought about it, the more I realized that it merely alienated us from the rest of the compound. Wouldn’t it have made more sense to bunk us all together, not keep us apart? We were wolves after all. We needed our team. At least, he should have put the Relief Division in its own building. There were certainly enough of those around for everyone.

  Or maybe I was just overthinking it like I did everything else. If anyone else on the team felt that way, I hadn’t heard about it.

  I made it to the back gates unnoticed and scaled the fence in my wolf form, paws landing in the foliage beyond silently, tail fanning out in a gentle whoosh behind me.

  There was barely a moon out tonight, but that didn’t stop me from seeing where I was going. I knew these paths and woods better than any other part of the city. It was where we did our training and our bonding. If the trees could talk, they would have more to say about us than anyone in Savannah.

  It would have made more sense for us to have treehouses than those ugly trailers on the compound, I thought irrelevantly as I moved.

  I waited for the rush of elation to overtake me as I broke into a sprint, my long legs dashing through the shrubs, dark fur catching on burs and twigs to twine against me. Not even the nocturnal animals were out tonight, leaving me to explore the fully discovered thick for the thousandth time or more. The fact that I was completely alone did not help alleviate the anxiety inside me.

  But it felt different, and the euphoria that usually overtook me on these runs failed to find me as I moved. I was too far into whatever this funk was that had taken hold of me, and every step I took only seemed to drive it home harder. I was not in a good place.